When Ignorance is Bliss
by Booyakalicious
Summary: Short and sweet. ^_^ . A point-of-view from Elly during the night over Mahanon as she contemplates what has happened so far and what will will occur the next day to Fei and herself.


Note: Xenogears and its characters are not mine, but are Squaresoft's (Namco has some rights to it too for the Xenosaga series, if you want to get technical.)  
  
When Ignorance is Bliss  
  
The last thing I heard him whisper last night was, "Thank you." I had smiled and replied, "You're welcome". He then fell asleep. But I never did follow suit. I was watching him as ha slumbered [past the issues he was confronted with, as he ventrued into a realm where only the sweetest of dreams existed... I hoped that this was the case, anyway, as I hated the thought of him having nightmares.  
  
The moonlight pured through the round window above my bed. His skin and hair glowed silver under the nocturnal radience. I ran my fingertips through his black-silver hair with a small smile on my face. Not many men coud have been considered beautiful, but in this state, 'beautiful' was the only way to describe him. With a sigh, I shifted to my side. There was so much on my mind.  
  
It had been a long battle thus far, I thought, both for him and myself. Our relationship had started with the fact that we were enemies; him being Lamb and me being Solarian. The people of my home contry had influenced my opinion of the Lambs, the earth dwellers; they were inferior trash. This was an irnoic fact because I had creeping suspicions that I was half Lamb. I was not blond and I did not have light-colored eyes as true- blooded Solarians did. Rather, I had bright red hair and eyes the color of the midnight sky.  
  
He was still my enemy despite his kindness towards me during our first meeting. I even tried to kill him once... oh, how I wish I could forget that!  
  
I had used Drive although I was completely aware that my reaction to the mind-altering drug could bring about destruction. The first time the Solarian army forced me to take it-forced because I was against doing so- I exhibited enough power to kill three people and injure a few others. However, my instincts failed. The Drive took its effect and I did everything I had in my power to kill that damned Lamb.  
  
He lived my to my suprise. I was uttely amazed he survived the wrath of my power. It couldn't have been brute strength along that kept him alive, but it was something above and beyond physical prowess. The question kept me wondering, but I didn't change my mind aobut leaving Solaris. He told me that I didn't belong there. Deep in my heart, I knew that was true. But at the time, I was denying the fact that what Solaris was doing , what I was doing, was was very wrong because I had never known another side to life. There had always been the lower class citizens who worked to support the upper class citizens whom I live abongst. I had not known of the horrendous facts of the fate they faced every day. Thery had been brainwashed and forced to do hard manual labor. Hell, they were even being killed and the upper classs citizens were eating their flesh! Never had I known that I lived with cannibals... that I was one too! It took awhile to uncover all the facts, but I turned away from my home country and went along with him as soon as I took the slightest hint that Solaris was bloody and heartless.  
  
After all that I had gone through with him and his friends, i had begun to realize that he and I had always been connected in some way. Even since the time I met him, with my gun pointed to his head, I felt as though I knew him well despite the fact that I had never met him before. He had called me 'Elly' although he had never seen me before in his life. When I turned sides and got to know him more, I felt as though I knew his scent and touch without him being close to me. And awhile ago... I had a dream. In this dream, a woman who looked exactly like me but was called 'Sophia' was being painted by a spitting image of him, but only he was called 'Lacan'... two figures from five hundred years ago. What a mind bender. The two of us had obviously been destined to find each other ever since then, even as we lived in a new age in new bodies. I never believed in reincarnation until people told me that I acted just like Sophia had. Now... I felt as though it was possible.  
  
But now... he was out to battle for the wisdom created by our god. He told me that the Ministry was attemptiong to take the wisdom into their own hands and were even attempting to take control of god. If this were to happen, the world would go to ruin. The battle against the Ministry would be taken to the point of death if need be. And he told me...  
  
That I couldn't come to fight along with the others. With him.  
  
What an outburst that had prompted!He said that it was way too dangerous, that I would only hinder the party's progress with their mission. I thogut that he believed me to be weak, to be naive. I had run off, thinking that I had just as much reason to fight as anyone. In my opinion, he had no right to deny my participation on the last mission. I wanted to go!  
  
A thousand thoughts rant through my mind as I took refuge in my room. "A fight to the death? Allow me to go in cas you die so I can be there for you!" I once muttered bitterly as I tried to blink back tears. I wanted to be with him until the end of the world at that very moment. At that very moment, I realized how much I loved him.  
  
Now in the path of the pale moonlight wih his steady breath on my ear and his right arm around me, I knew that he truly loved me. He didn't want me to go because my life really didn't belong to me anymore; the whole Nisan Sect was looking at me as their only hope. Masses of people had begun to transform into beings that were not quite human, 'Wels', and were suffering greatly. They came to Nisan in search of healing; both in a physical and spiritual respect. They believed me to be Sophia, who had been the hope to the people in a time of great need, all those years ago; I was following suit now. He couldn't risk my life when I had so much responsiblilty resting upon my shoulders. It was a truly unselfish thing for him to say when my motives had been the opposite.  
  
True, it had been selfish not to think about the people in Nisan before wanting to go. But selfishness is a normal human emotion that can throw one's reason out of proportion when they realize that their loved ones are at risk. Sure, the people needed me, but I wanted to be with him. The facts were plain and simple. Howerver, his statement would be what I would have to go by. I would have to stay, regardless of my selfish desires.  
  
The good thing was that my selfish esires had been to reduced to little more than nothing at this moment. I had become one with him. The decision to go that far had been mutual, of course. If one of us had to take on what we had done without the nessessary go-ahead by the other, it wouldn't have been perfect. But it was perfect. We had achieved a position in a place where delicious peace was all that existed. For a while, we could forget that we were in danger of losing each other.  
  
Although this peace was wonderful while it lasted, I couldn't help but slip to the realization that dawn was approaching. The sky was still a dark blue, the stars shone bright and the moon still shed its light upon us. But when the sky changed to the rainbow of hues brought about by the sunrise, when the stars and moon faded from view for yet another day, he would leave.  
  
"I want this to last forever. This nigh should last forever," I murmured as I stared out the window. I wasn't much of a person to cry, but I was close to doing so. I sighed and drew in a breath. My gaze shifted back to his face. I was surprised to see his warm gray eyes staring at me.  
  
"Elly. You're awake," he whispered.  
  
"I've been awake ever since you fell asleep," I responded quietly.  
  
"Why?" He turned to his side, staring at me inquisitively.  
  
"Too much on my mind," I answered.  
  
"What kind of things are bothering you?"  
  
I closed my eyes. "I was thinking about how far were have come from the time we first met and how much we've been through together. And... how much I can't bear to stay here while you go off..."  
  
His fingertips touched my cheek lightly. "You're crying."  
  
I wasn't about to deny it. I opened my eyes and stared into his. The warmth, the love that they held was almost too much to bear. Tears streamed doen my cheeks.  
  
He shook his head and embraced me tightly. "Ah, don't worry about a thing! I'll be fine, Elly! I already told you that. I'll be okay..."  
  
His kind words soothed my soul as he caressed my shoulders. Gently, he brushed my hair out of my face. My vision became blurred as my tears intensified. He sounded so positive , but I couldn't help but think of the worst.  
  
He touched my face again, softly sweeping my tears away with his fingers. His actions made me smile. "Please don't cry. I will be okay," he assured me a second time . "Be strong like you always are! It's not like you to fall this low," he said. "Be strong," he repeated in a whisper as he gently kissed my lips.  
  
I was swept away from my worries as he kissed me sweetly. It seemed as if time had frozen, the way it had earlier that night. Not wanting the illusion that this moment had created to slip away, I kissed him back, tasting a hint of hope and a lot of love. As I pulled back, I took in a few deep breaths. I looked at him in the eye.  
  
"Fer, we can't let this moment fall from our grasp. Now, it feel as if time is standing still and the only thing on my mind is how much I love you, I murmured.  
  
He grinned. "Elly..." he whispered fervently. "Time's not gonna continue until we've savored the fruit of this moment as much as we can." With this, he drew me close and took a taste of blissful ignorance of what lay at hand in the forthcoming hours.  
  
... Ignorance is truly bliss.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Concluding note: I realize that this is utter cheese. But despite how "cheesy" this is, I am a sucker for sentimental garbage. Really, I am. Besides, Elly is a good character to write POV's for. Please review! 


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